Archive for December, 2007

A single man, a single dream: banging.

December 10, 2007

Everyone knows online dating sites are a load of old codswallop. Why use the cold and distant medium of a screen when there are things to be written on all around you in your local area?

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If your a girl and want bangs call Burrthing Richard on 07985 737 920

Your like it

Come to Northamptonshire…

December 10, 2007

Whilst on an aimless long walk in the summer, I strolled upon this estate that seemed to me to resemble (or be) some kind of military showhome. A real jewel of the Northamptonshire countryside, yet strangely not on the map (I recommend clicking on the picture below to see the sign properly)…

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Later on during the adventure, I came across this massive pile of bricks.

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I almost felt like I was the size of a small toy and approaching an unimaginative child’s Lego house.

If this doesn’t make Northamptonshire look appealing, you can always go to its main town to satiate your previously unacknowledged desires…click on the postcard below which has been sent here especially for you from the Grosvenor Centre, Northampton.

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You really are sure of a welcome, I promise, despite everyone in the postcard looking distinctly disgruntled and avoiding eye contact at all costs.

What’s the weather like where you are?

December 5, 2007

Have I ever told any of you that I am distantly related to the notorious weather man Michael Fish? I wonder if I’m anything like him.

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I hope I have inherited this man’s intuition for style and his ability to represent his personality with fashion in an innovative and captivating way.

Funnily enough, I actually feel like Michael and I have something in common, aside from our genes and a penchant for woolly jumpers. I can see it in his eyes; he’s somehow amused by his job.

This man knows that the nation’s TV viewers are hanging on his every word, anticipating whether or not they’ll need to take out a brolly tomorrow, but he can have a laugh about it and doesn’t let the power go to his head.

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I’m pretty inspired by old Michael; he manages to come across as both earnest (see above) and able to engage in a good old romp of jocularity.

Assessing and reporting the risk of deadly storms must take its toll and leave you feeling existentially confused.

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However, this man understands the importance of friends and serving the community, as demonstrated by the picture below.

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I hope I can do him proud.